Tuesday 1 February 2011

the cooking manual

Take a handful of willing timewasters.


Give them plenty to drink.

Woo them with your place. So much so that they would want to live there themselves. In fact, make one of them make you an offer you'd be challenged to refuse had you gotten drunk enough to consider it in the first place... (Look mum, no names!)


BUT !! Make sure you give them more to drink next time so they don't notice stuff like...


(Moldy old dessert stuff and expired condiment)


Then, hide your books, so that no one finds out who your biggest inspiration is.

And lets be honest here, after Delia's last appearance on telly, haven't we all burned her books? Of course not... but she was asking for it, wasn't she?

As it stands the crumpets were nice. Though, calling them mini pizzas was certainly misleading.

I blame Delia, not Isabelle. Let’s be clear on this here.

Next, we had more drinks. Got all merry and rather hungry. Found out that Sasha is no connoisseur but rather a very hungry youngish man. He insisted on eating our secret guest's crumpet (it must be said that our secret guest lives in a different time zone to the rest of us and only thought of getting ready to come to dinner party round 1:30AM. our secret guest was supposed to be rather special. and no, it was not supposed to be Brad dressed in drag. though, that certainly would've been special. maybe a bit predictable. but special non the less.)

Anyhow, the main was absolutely lovely. Delicious. Satisfying. Though it might have taken a little longer than 30min to cook. Again, I blame Jamie Oliver, not Isabelle. I think he highly underestimated how long it takes to cook certain things when you don't have 15 assistants chopping and cleaning and generally maintaining your sanity.


We then all retired to the living room to play some game that no one knew how to play and drink some more drinkies... waiting for the marvelous dessert to bake...


Okay, now, look at those pictures... what do you see? Have you noticed the concern? The microwave? But most importantly the effort?

Ahhh... the damn thing spilled and burned. And we couldn't rescue it. But by god we tried. Look at it, it looks so yummy.

Instead we had Green and Black's ice cream. With sparklers.

It got as all rather happy. Some happier than others...

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